Portraits of a Masked Mind


#451

SONNETS

For those who don’t know what a sonnet is, let me explain you:

  • It’s a poetic composition.
  • It has 14 verses divided in two tercetos and two quartets.
  • stanza of three and four verse each one respectively
  • The last word of each verse should rhyme.
  • It talks about a feeling that develops throughout the sonnet.
  • Its verses should be hendecasyllabic (that’s mean that each lines must have 11 syllables)
  • As you may know, when a sonnets is translate, it loses its rhyme, so the English version is just a guide.

#452

THE SONG OF THE NOCTURNAL BIRDS

One day the birds will be silent:
What we see, know and want.
Will this be the last thing we say?
The rain takes away what we have.

Our dream is for those we know
Can we understand what we leave behind?
Since the horizon is another today, do we fly?
Being possible that we reflect.

Whether the cemetery fell
The old bushes adorn
And our hearts hear them.

With our simple singing cry
And with the whistle they fulfilled
Only this way, life, make us happy.

EL CANTO DE LOS PÁJAROS NOCTURNOS
Un día los pájaros callaremos:
Lo que vemos, sepamos y querramos.
¿Serán esto lo último que nos digamos?
La lluvia se lleva lo que tenemos.

Nuestro sueño es para quien conocemos
¿Podremos entender lo que dejamos?
Ya que el horizonte es otro hoy ¿Volamos?
Siendo posible que nos reflejemos.

Ya sea que al camposanto cayesen
Los viejos matorrales adornasen
Y nuestros corazones los oyesen.

Con nuestro canto sencillo llorasen
Y con el silbido aquéllos cumpliesen
Sólo así, la vida, nos alegrasen.


#453

MEMORIES OF THE ANCESTRAL NAVIGATOR
The gusts of wind took us
where the angels cried
The insipid nights swallowed
our memories that were there

We saw those truths that charged
with those lies that our hearts
desired, for they longed
forget the emptiness they saved

We shared our joys
We tried to think in your kindness
and how you would hug us

“The life that is in your extremities
is not just for dreaming” - You said.
… We liked those skills.

RECUERDOS DEL NAVEGANTE ANCESTRAL

Las ráfagas del viento nos llevaron
hacia donde los ángeles lloraban.
Las insípidas noches se tragaban
nuestros recuerdos que allí se hallaron.

Vimos esas verdades que cargaron
con esas mentiras que deseaban
nuestros corazones, pues anhelaban
olvidar el vacío que guardaron

Compartiéndonos nuestros alegrías
tratamos de pensar en tus bondades
y hasta en cómo tú nos abrazarías.

“La vida que está en tus extremidades
no es solo para soñarla.” Decías.
… Nos gustaban esas habilidades.


#454

OF THE WRONG FEELINGS
“To kiss you slowly I send…”
He awoke from the place that created his soul
He never stayed waiting or calm
and then he dug a grave in the river.

My mistake wasn’t love him since I laugh
but his body touch with my palm.
It’s not him, I’m the one who disallows
He was a very shy and cold underage.

My attempts were in vain, I understand.
However, I’m still love him, and I won’t go
without fight for what he is suffering

I should leave him and go
… To these feelings I can’t understand
I miss him, but I have to continue.

DE LOS SENTIMIENTOS EQUIVOCADOS
“Para besarte lentamente envío…”
Despertó del sitio que creó su alma.
Ya nunca se quedó esperando o en calma
y entonces cavó una tumba en el río.

Mi error no fue amarlo desde que río
sino su cuerpo tocar con mi palma.
No es él, más bien soy yo quien se desalma
Él era un menor muy tímido y frío.

Vanos fueron mis intentos, lo entiendo.
Sim embargo aún lo amo y no me he de ir
Sin luchar por lo que éste está sufriendo.

Debería abandonarlo y partir
…A estos sentimientos no los comprendo
Lo extraño, pero tengo que seguir.


#455

THE OCEAN LIES RESTLESS NOW
A light reflected in the tide
is the warmth of his bright being
is a big and flashing start
… In his absence the night surrounds us.

Oh love! With my pain do anything.
Insensitivity is suffocating
Show me your radiant smile!
I’m so unhappy with this life.

Fled from everything and everyone out of fear
I can’t pretend I will be able
to smile and forget the pain

In the seas that foreman traveled…
The last you said was “heat”
I just want you find your peace.

EL OCÉANO YACE INQUIETO AHORA

Una luz reflejada en la marea
es la calidez de su ser brillante
es una estrella grande y destellante.
…En su ausencia la noche nos rodea.

¡Oh amor! Con mi dolor haz lo que sea.
La insensibilidad es asfixiante
¡Demuéstrame tu sonrisa radiante!
Estoy infeliz con esta vida fea.

Huía de todo y todos por temor
No puedo fingir que seré capaz
de sonreír y olvidar el dolor.

En los mares viajó ese capataz…
Lo último que dijiste fue “calor”
Solo deseo que encuentres tu paz.


#456

BEATS OF THE DEFUNCT HEART

My life was empty from before
I was nobody, nor did I want to change it
I wandered to say it and think about it
I was who followed the dominant ones.

I let their honor down to forget it
I went to live in “Hanging Gardens”
There, everyone are my companions
I found how to die without saying

My good image is what was left
Don’t resent me, I’m not worth it
I wasn’t important and I hindered them

His wife and his friends cry his sentence
The foreman left then when he was
looking for a reason to the dinner.

LATIDOS DEL DIFUNTO CORAZÓN

Mi vida estaba vacía desde antes.
No era nadie, ni quería cambiarlo.
Deambulaba al decirlo y pensarlo.
Yo era quien seguía a los dominantes.

Decepcioné su honor al olvidarlo.
Me fui a vivir a “Jardines Colgantes,”
ahí todos son mis acompañantes.
Hallé cómo morir sin comentarlo

Mi buena imagen es lo que quedaba.
No me lamenten, no valgo la pena
Yo no era importante y les estorbaba.

Su esposa y amigos lloran su condena.
El capataz los dejó cuando andaba
buscando una razón para la cena.


#457

Two of your stories are going together imo, “OF THE WRONG FEELINGS” and “THE OCEAN LIES RESTLESS NOW" are kinda like part 1 and part 2 of the same thing, of a sad heart…that´s how I got these lines. Probably “BEATS OF THE DEFUNCT HEART” is refering to the same theme. They all sound somehow desperat - hopeless and tell us about the dark side of love and desires… . And about nostalgia. That´s what I feel reading these lines. Now I see two options: either you wrote this to let something flow out of you or it is your intention to make the reader feel this feels, however way it was- it arrives with power at the receiver, aka the reader. Woah.

Since you wrote this post where you shared with the family about you actual mental situation, I can say I feel you very much in your work this time, as if it all flow out of your bleeding heart into your lines. And it´s only good that you have this amazing talent to build pictures with ur words, and bring these pictures and feels to the reader (us) in a very memorable, impressive way. I had a few problems here and there to get you this time, felt like you´ve maybe written it like if you´d rushed it ore were in a haste… here and there I have the feel that there are words missing… but maybe that´s on purpose? To leave things open? All in all you are very creative once more, thank you for sharing this with us and take a biiig bonecrusher hug from you big sis… :hugs:


#458

Almost.

These sonnets are from 2-3 months ago tbh. And yes, they’re connected each other, but just some of them…

Thank you very much for you words! :hugs: I appreciate them all :blush:

That’s why I don’t write like this ussually, this poems has its own rules, and they are a headache to me (I tend to write free poetry). In this case is hard to build a normal sentence because of the rules (the hendecasyllabic, the 14 lines with its rhyme and all that thing) and as I like suffer with that I keep writing them jajaja.

There will be 20 sonnets, I already have 8 of them :slight_smile:

That’s what I needed :smile: :grin: :relaxed: Thank you! :hugs:


#459

All were really good poems brotherrr :hugs: i agree with walker.


#460

PORTRAITS OF A MASKED MIND

Experiments
Spending the time

Every day is the same. A sunrise, A breakfast, A work, A rest… Just this day is different, It isn’t a Saturday neither a Sunday. This day I can scape and spend the hours without major commitments. Today I can ramble on my strangest ideas, craziest thoughts, actions without sense, and more dummy things that are in my heart and my mind.

Today I can feel what I didn’t feel yesterday and tomorrow I will feel what I don’t today for feeling yesterday. Today, that moment means something, tomorrow a memory without a doubt I’m spending the moment…

When tomorrow arrives and I find myself standing there watching that my actions didn’t bring anything what I waited I’ll bend myself And I will wish come back and don’t spend the time. Just to realize that I am still falling in the same mistake and this one doesn’t let me follow for fall in the same. It seems that I love spend the time without do something productive.

Even so, this sensation happens only today, the other days are a routine.

Surprise

It was the year 1987, Ana and Rafael were studying to be great actors.
Ana wanted to be a singer and actress on Broadway,
Rafael wanted to be a film director.

One day while rehearsing, Ana met Mario.
They began to spend much time together,
leaving aside Rafael.

Rafael decided to take revenge on spending time with Luisa.
They went everywhere together.
Apparently, none of the 2 would achieve
their dream of being someone big and known in life.

The months passed and things went from bad to worse,
Ana was angry to know that Rafael spent much time with Luisa.
Rafael was the same.

Well, brothers sometimes don’t leave their toys and ignore others.

From you I learned to:
  1. Never underestimate you because of your age.

  2. Be sincere with my thoughts and active at all times to avoid
    boredom.

  3. The sickness doesn’t matter, if my will is greater.

  4. In spite a bad situation, get your attention correctly.

  5. Use my weaknesses as strengths.

  6. Express my emotions effusively.

  7. Seek the way of not being where I do not want to.

  8. Overcome the fear of telling the truth by which they will say.

  9. Stand firm on what to do before resting.

  10. Concentrate on what matters.

  11. Open my mind little by little.

  12. Behave like somebody else to help you.

  13. If you have confidence in me, you will help me open my heart.

  14. I will pay attention if it really interests me.

  15. Do not be so hyperactive / consented.

  16. Go forward, even if others surrender.

  17. A bad day can change with a good friend.

  18. Do everything with enthusiasm and show my spirits.

  19. Trust little by little in new people.

  20. You must make me work for my sake.

  21. Still without materials, work as a team and help in whatever I can.

  22. Demand me to demand you.

  23. Try to learn, but still have serious problems.

  24. Study because I like it and not because I have to.

  25. Recognize who you are and value yourself for it.

  26. The material does not matter, but that does not mean leaving aside the aesthetics.

  27. Be good for something and exploit it.

  28. Point out your faults without humiliating yourself.

  29. Demonstrate how you can do things to keep my attention.

  30. Do not give up for not being like them.

  31. Smile a little more.

  32. Express myself freely and then reconsider my bad expressions.

  33. Be good, even if the other person does not deserve it.

  34. Know you before you judge harshly.

The detail

Boy : It’s my friend’s birthday, she likes me, and I like her-at least I think so. Her parents will celebrate it in a week, so I decided to bring a gift; my problem is that I don’t know what to give her. Maybe a box of chocolates, a bouquet of roses of the most fragrant or a teddy with her name? -Sigh. - A card would be ideal, since I don’t have enough money for a good gift. How I would like to know what to give to her. I’ve known her for a few years and I know a lot about her, but I’m so nervous that I don’t remember anything at the moment. I pity ask, she will think that I don’t pay attention to what she tells me and she will hate me for it.

Mmm… I’ll write her a letter and decorate it with the colors she likes the most. “Dear friend, happy birthday (ñ.ñ) I hope you have a good time…” NO! That’s what anyone says, it must be original.

Mmm… What do if I write her what I feel? Mmm… I don’t want to lose her friendship… It’s difficult to express what I feel, more being who I am… Society and everyone around me criticize and call me immoral… I didn’t want this. I don’t know how or when it happened. I have to go on with the letter, a few days to go yet, mmm “Hi! Happy birthday, you know you’re the best and I love you! …” No, I can’t write that and give it to her like nothing.

Boy : I didn’t think it was so difficult to write an original birthday letter, I should tell her and already…

Party day.

Boy : ¡Wow how quickly the day came, there she is! And she’s alone! It’s my chance… Hello, I want to talk to you … Wait a minute … Who is he?
Girl : He’s my boyfriend!

Boy : What! Noooooooooo I want to tell you that I loveeeeee youuu!

Wake up sweating in his bed.

Boy : For God! It was a nightmare. This is the last time I see MTV before bed. I’ll call her, just to make sure. Hello Friend! Hey, you don’t have a boyfriend, do you? Just curiosity.
Girl : Of course not. However, I must tell something you… It’s something I’ve been keeping for a few months… I’ll tell you tomorrow on my birthday… Happy evening!
Boy : Wow What will it mean? Good night. Now I am completely aroused.

The next day.

Boy : We are alone and this letter is for you… Now, what do you want to talk?

"I’m not who waits for you forever, I am the one who listens to you, counsels you, accompanies you and loves you with the heart. I won’t know the solutions to all the problems, but I will try to help you by showing you my support. If you really don’t feel anything for me, just tell me, I’ll understand it and I’ll leave you alone, I don’t want you to lie to yourself or to myself for trying to please me… "

With this letter, she will tell me she wants to go out with me. I’m not pushing her and I’m showing my feelings for her. I finally found the perfect detail for her. I await her response…

Deepths of the heart

A LITTLE OF EMOTION

What had happened? Where was the emotion with which we used to do the things? Without emotions, we are robots. No, it’s not true. We are something with feet that can’t and has nothing to feel a little of emotion. A rock Does it have more emotion than I do? Why? If it is only an object. I instead, supposedly have a little excitement. Now, where is it?

JAIL OF PAIN

The most obscure thoughts, the most violent actions,
The darkest moments, the most dangerous adventures,
All of them kept in this jail of pain …
All of them waiting for the moment to escape.
Nevertheless, the moment has passed; they have already escaped and found their next victim. Everything is lost, forgiveness no longer exists, trust is lost, and now treachery reigns in a heart Oh! What a nightmare has been this.

SURVIVING THIS DREAM

Neither the best poet nor illusionist can continue to survive this dream… With great sadness describes his lack of creativity and kills all hope of life with his little practice of emotion. He only knows how to feel sad and tries to disguise his darkest thoughts wrapped in false opportunities to continue surviving this dream. How I want to wake up soon from this nightmare and not die in a frustrated attempt, nor continue to live with these contradictory things.

WAIT, I NEED MORE

Immersed in this sea of emotions, I can’t avoid the mistakes I’ve not made. All this is for you. Wait! I need more. I don’t want help without deserving it; I don’t ask for compassion without judgment, a flower is more important than this depressed character. I don’t want anything without effort, I don’t want senses without directions; nor directions without senses… That flower, even if it is destroyed, it means more to me than for you, why don’t you wait? I need more… More time…

More space… More life…

JUST ALONE

Just alone, I understand the lack of emotion, the terror of opening my interior, the intense need to be accepted, loved, found … Feeling that I can stand and keep standing without fail. Just alone, I can experience what this agonizing wait means to you, just alone. Every mistake, every success I have made, is now part of you and me. Only alone, I can’t find the paths to the answers I want to find. Maybe just alone, not… Maybe just together… maybe…

HARDER THAN METAL

A great way to go, who has reached the goal, has achieved what he seeks, except me … because my heart is harder than metal. No one knows or is interested in knowing why, and, I am not willing to respond to those with “fish ears.” even the brightest smile can’t break what remains of a character like me, someone as greedy and fussy as greedy deserves all that.

CONFUSION OF A REAL FEELING

The sea has covered everything, now there is only an island left. I think that I keep alone, I see my lack of emotion; I see how that jail-shaped object opens. Now it has become a great and painful reality. How can I survive this dream, or is it reality? Why do I have this confusion of sense? This false nightmare is real. I am the one who wait and needs more. Time is over. Am I alone capable of surviving this confusion of real feeling? I already don’t see anything.

GUITARS’ WAR

What began as music, ended in a tragedy Oh! How I wish it were a poem, or a story. Anything but the tragedy of living an alien life while looking for mine Did I wake up from reality or do I dream about this emptiness? Are guitars my allies? What happened here? Do I live in a nightmare or am I alone? Another memory for a destroyed jail, while the guitars have a fight No! It’s not a fight, it’s not a battle, it’s the guitar war…

YOU NEED TO KNOW IT BEFORE DIE

I lived a depressed and bitter life forever. I finally understand everything; these writings remain as proof of this “Odyssey.” I never tried to fill my emptiness; I turned everything into a prison. I wanted to survive, but in my attempt, I stopped living the reality. I asked you to wait when you were gone, because I never came back. I thought and managed to create a tragedy that I call nightmare, so much that I hardened my heart. I managed to confuse everything and then started this war of guitars, without knowing that, each one has a specific name: Reality and Fantasy…

A PIECE OF GARDEN

Even if it’s late, this letter will come to you… It was I who wanted to be alone; I didn’t recognize anything important or value it until I lost it. The war ended and I don’t believe what I see, both guitars stop the fire and become friends. They come to me. They become a single guitar called “A Piece of Garden” and takes its natural form. This experience has ended and I cannot hesitate, because we are together.

You are not perfect

I know that like everyone, you are not perfect.
I know that like everyone, you have heard many times
"But what matters is what’s inside."
I know that many of your problems are because you looked for them and you found them.
I know that you are imperfect and that’s why I know that your company is my best ally to combat loneliness.
I know that you are not perfect and that’s why you will understand my imperfections.
I don’t want someone perfect, but someone imperfect like you.
I seek a complement, not an expert in marking my imperfections.
I know you are not perfect.

Where are you mom?

Today May 10, my mother is gone, I’m 8 years old and I’m waiting for her to come back, I want to give her a big hug and her gift. For some strange reason, she didn’t return.

Where are you mom? It’s been 10 years and you still don’t come back. Why didn’t you come back? Is it something I did wrong? Did you fight with Dad? Where are you mom? I don’t want to keep waiting.

Everything bad and good that happens to me I share it with everyone, but I want to share it with you, the affection my father gives me doesn’t compare with yours Why don’t you call me or write me? It’s been five more years, I know that someday you will come back, please hurry mom and returns, I still miss you.

Mom, I’m 28 today, and I see you’re not going back. Okay, I will not wait for you anymore.

2 years later…

Raul, is that you? It’s me, your mother Oh my God! Look how you’ve grown… Listen, I have no excuses and I don’t expect you to accept me, or you’ll forgive me right now for leaving you when you were 8… I just want you to know the reasons why I had to leave you.

I had a very delicate problem that I had to solve, I never called you or I wrote you because I was afraid of losing you. The people I had to deal with were very bad and for love, I had to leave you all this time… I hope, that… with time, you can forgive me…

Mom, I have nothing to forgive you, now I understand that your love for me is bigger than any problem we have… The important thing is that you are finally with me… I love you Mom!

Verses

I Wish

I wish I had the courage to see you
I wish my words would come to you
I wish my dreams were true
I wish you would excuse me
I wish I apologized myself
I wish you were still here.

Forget you
Today I thought of you, today I talked about you…
With the eagerness of always wanted to write
about your qualities and defects.
I didn’t remember anything and managed to smile,
I finally forgot you
And I managed to be happy again.

Talk
I can talk to the future,
I can talk to the past,
but I cannot talk to the present.
I’m still looking for a way to get close to him.

New era
I want

I want to say hi.
I want to say what I feel,
I want to say what I think,
I want to say what I believe,
I want to say what I want.

I want to live,
I want to grow,
I want to be happy,
I want to continue being a child,
I want to educate,
I want to learn,
I want to meet,
I want to know,
I want to have that strength.
I want to smile,
I want to want.

I want to talk to you,
I want to see you,
I want to meet you,
I want to hug you,
I want to stop hating you,
I want to forgive you,
I want to love you.

I want a friend
I want a sincere affection.
I want a pleasant memory.
I want to be sad,
I want to be happy,
I want to leave,
I want to stay,
I want to be present,
I want to disappear,
I want to shut up,
I want to talk,
I want to love,
I want to want

The original story

Everything was ready to begin to write what his heart dictated, he had already read how book he had in front of, he knew by heart all the poems since the A to the Z, in all languages and knew deep the maximums exponents of literature through the ages. It just lacked one thing, he take his fountain pen and a sheet to print his ideas.

When he took his fountain pen and began to write, he didn’t know how to baste his ideas and he created a story like no other. He had created a story worthy of god. He didn’t understand its magnitude and he discarded it, thinking that a story must be faithful to its structure and its base. Leaving so, the best story of all time in the trash can.

White

One day, in an urban school, in a department in Guatemala, the teacher asked her students to bring any object and say what they like about that object. Raúl is a 9-year-old boy who doesn’t have any type of family support -he is an orphan-, but he always strives to do his homework. That day he didn’t know which of all the things to bring, after a while, he found what he needed.

On the day of the presentation all the kids passed and one by one, they were talking about what they liked. Raúl was ready to pass, the teacher was anxious to see what he had prepared. To her surprise and his classmates too, he only carried a blank page. He gave it to her and didn’t want to say anything until all his classmates passed to the front of the classroom.

Just when he was going to pass … The bell rang for recreation. The teacher, very surprised and confused, asked Raúl, what does this mean? You are not like that; your work is more elaborate and dynamic. This is a blank sheet, nor does your name have. What’s happening? Look- he said with a smile in his face- I asked you pass to the end because that blank page has a story. It’s a bit long and that’s why I want to my classmates listen to me, and for that I must listen to all of them first. Can I retire now? Yes, -she answered.-

When they entered classes, the teacher continued with the activity until Raúl pass again. He said this sheet is not only a sheet. It’s the beginning of everything. It’s the imagination, the light, the life, the emptiness, what blinds… There are thousands of images, for example, Hector, what do you see in it? I see clouds and if I squint a bit, I can see the sand on the beaches. Moreover, you, Ana, what do you see there? Ahh I see … bamboo sticks and bears playing on them. Teacher, what do you see? I see a big heart … and a student who is able to innovate with something as simple and beautiful as that blank page.

The teacher, crying with surprise and gratitude, got up from her desk and hugged Raúl, congratulated him and all his classmate cheered him for the originality showed. At the end of the day, Raul asked one last question: And you, what do you see on the blank page?

Micro-stories

WAIT
He was just standing there, waiting for something to happen, and it happened: He died in the sea of oblivion and profound silence.

MEMORIES
Parks, birds, a hole … A grave: Empty.

REALITY
I had a dream. I woke up and I was still in it.

CYCLES
Be born. Live. Ignore. To know. Recognize. Create. Standing out. Get older. Die.

BE BORN
There was a noise. Then I was born.

Alma Rosa

Divine woman, strong woman.
Affectionate mother, brave mother.
In your soul you carry love, and passion from your belly.
Mother of profession, teacher of my noble heart.

You teach me to be dedicated in what I do
You show me your virtues by giving me your hand.
When your name sounds, my being rejoices.
If my being is calm, it’s because you have taught me.

Divine woman, strong woman
Your body suffers, but your heart stays strong
What I would not give to see you always happy!
Divine woman, strong woman
My eyes cry of happiness when I see you.
When I guided for you,
Life showed me that you are here, in front of me, happy

Forgiveness

…Distressed by recent events, Alex is locked in deep remorse:

Alex : My heart cries and my soul despairs, there is no one near to contemplate what I have done to deserve such punishment, even so I will continue to seek to amend my mistakes.

His Conscience : You know that the guilt expressed with your own mouth, can free you from pain, you should only promise yourself not to do it again and fulfill it.
Alex : It’s correct, I know, but when everyone knows it and the guilt does not go away… It’s because… You have to go with the person to whom you have hurt and you must prove that you are sorry.

His Conscience : Why would you tell everyone, except who you really should tell?
Alex : You just said it, express your guilt and it will go away.

His Conscience : But… what’s stopping you from going to apologize?
Alex : Where this person is, I can’t reach … And even if I could, my thoughts don’t let me pronounce those words…

His Conscience : Will you pay more attention to your thoughts than to me? Why would you doubt me?

Alex : I don’t know, I just… I want to do it… I’m about to… But… I cannot, I think I’m very weak sometimes…

His Conscience : You aren’t, you just accepted something you didn’t want to…

Alex : I was happy in my work. All my companions loved me. There was only one person who would not let me fully enjoy him: Erick. That wretch made my life impossible; anything was an excuse for him. I came to hate him so much that I killed him. I had already studied everything necessary to execute my macabre plan; however, I was postponing his execution, but not the desire to cut him in several parts. The motive? I met a 9-year-old boy, his name is Andres, and he was the only one with whom I felt identified and I still am. The day I seriously thought of torturing and killing Erick; this child appeared and by talking to him, I calmed down.

Even so, I had no idea that what I was going to do will be so much worse… Here is the most repulsive description of a death brought about by my own hand and now has no divine forgiveness. Erick’s weakness was to be drunken. If being sober was unbearable, being drunken worse. It was 2 years ago, I know because Andrew’s birthday was around that time. That day I took Erick - already drunken - to the basement of his house -located in an industrial area.- With so much noise it was impossible for someone to hear his screams while executing my plan and later, I’d dispose of his remains.

Being in the basement at 22:30, I tied him to a chair and gagged with a thin rope. The rope ran from side to side, at the speed I wanted, so I slowly burned his skin. I took a break from that… and… with a special tool, I tore a fingernail from the skin lifting it slowly… How I enjoyed with his face of suffering and his voice dulled by liquor asking for pity, it was an audiovisual delight. I threw boiling water in his eyes and let liquid hot wax drop all over his body, I came back with the rope and continued to run it from side to side… In the end, he died and with an ax, I dismembered him, I kept his head and I succeeded to reduce it of size, with the body, I emptied all the organs and I used his body of suitcase for several months, as for hands and the feet, I gave them to some savage animals… I know, that night I became a bloody bastard and a ruthless torturer, sadistic and full of joy and a delight of the very Satan.

After these statements, the judge decides to lift the session and leaves Alex alone with the guard, who starts to bother him.

Guard : So tell me… What are you going to do? They will condemn you to many years. Then what ails you? Your cellmate or what? -Asks sarcastically.

Alex : Not being able to obtain the forgiveness of the most injured person in this whole affair.

Guard : Who the fuck do you mean?

Alex : I’m talking about Erick’s son…

Guard : What do you say?! Erick’s son! What did you do to him bastard?

Alex : Nothing! He is out of danger, but he is the child I so admire. I shared everything with him and he with me.

Guard : I’ll kill you if I find out you’re a pedophile, sick bastard, approach him and you’ll die.

Judge : Guard! Stop right there.

Alex and the guard : What is your lordship doing here?

Judge : I came for my glasses. However, what’s going on here?

Guard : This sick rapist “wants to apologize” to the child for the death of his father. Stupid assassin, you have no right to be able to approach that child while I’m here.

Alex : I’m not a rapist! I would never hurt that child… At least not a physical injury… He is very close to me; that the guards kill me or that they rape me in prison, but, please, Mr. Judge, grant me this last wish.

Guard : It will be a pleasure to suck you off scum.

Judge : Guard, enough! Get out of here, calm yourself down and then come back.
Guard : You don’t give orders!

Judge : My room, my domain, my orders! Go rest now.

Guard : I will call another partner before I let go.

Judge : Ok. Returning to your request, Alex, we will consult it each other.

Alex : I just want to apologize to the child. I didn’t know that Erick was his father. Andrew never mentioned it. I knew it when I checked Erick’s personal documents, I saw a familiar picture and… Erick and Andrew were there. From that moment, I live a repentance that does not disappear, that’s why I surrendered. I couldn’t bear to see Andrés like that. He looked fine. After the death of his father, he improved a lot in his school and I tried to explain several times to him, but I never could. Today I come to receive my punishment or my salvation, because the greatest punishment is to see him and not to speak to him, and so, I will wait here, standing and resigned, your decision and I will accept it.

After this Alex is left alone, being watched for other guard, in the living room, while the guard is in his office and the members of the court ramble about the Alex’s fate.

His conscience : You’ve exceeded this time with your show of repentance.

Alex : You did it, didn’t you? I appreciate that, but now I’m afraid of what happens to me.

His conscience : Who would not? All living things, even plants themselves, they feel fear.

Alex : What do plants have to do with all this? You confuse me.

His conscience : All. Andres is a plant, right? Tell me, the last time you saw him. What happened?

Alex : Anyway, he’s not a plant. Ahh… Well… Let’s see… I was at the school gate and I wanted to talk to him… When I saw him, his gaze penetrated my soul… It was a look of surprise and terror mixed with fear and perplexity. I could not say anything but “Hello Andrew, happy afternoon!” In addition, he left. I wanted to go after him, but a group of children stopped me. When I got out, he was gone… That was about 2 and a half months ago Why the question?

His conscience : Because you need to remember. Now no matter the decision of the judge, you have made a breakthrough. Bye.

Alex : I don’t understand you and that you are part of me jajaja how ironic is not it?

In the background a noise is heard, the door opens and let’s everyone in the room again. This time, with the answer in hand. The Alex’s fate is already written, now only remains to hear.

Jury : Alex! We already have your final verdict. Your sentence is… A draw between Death, Conviction and Freedom?! What does this mean?!

Judge : I know how to fix it. There is one person who has not yet voted.

Jury : Who?!

Judge : That person is someone who has been present at the courthouse.

It’s time for you to decide what will happen to Alex, I leave the options in your hands. Please choose the one you like best and keep reading:

Letter A: Death.
Letter B: Condemned.
Letter C: Freedom.


#461
Fragments
Woman, soul of bird

I remembered everything when I saw you.
Those eyes filled my heart with tears,
You made my soul regret
And it ended up wandering in the warm streets of your body.

Those nights where the birds reposed in my window,
You were next to me, in my bed,
Reading each verse of the guy that left you.
We were friends; I fell in love with your free bird soul and your color of freedom.

How it hurt me, see you let yourself be dragged by another!
Why didn’t you understand my pain?
Now I am rambling in this world.
How I hope to see you again soon.

Stop to cry for me. I am in this hole
And you are flying freely again.
I know that my sacrifice was worth it.
Oh woman! Oh Soul of bird!
Color of the freedom, you don’t become a
Be completely free.

Let me know that my departure wasn’t in vain,
That your death is only the beginning of the true freedom.
Beautiful woman, color of bird, free soul!
Who will reach whom?
We are awaiting for each other forever,
But not for all the time

Social Slave

Government: Welcome to the society Slave 1 394 141 722. All you have to do is nothing. We control your fate and there is nothing you can do. If you disobey us, we will marginalize you and you will be nobody. The slaves 9 843 567 841 and 1 568 498 021 will be who take care of your “education.” You must obey us at all times and submit to our will. This country will always be our whore and it does not matter, you can never change it.

Parents: From now, we will call you Robert. You are our son; you are destined to be someone great in the life. When you turn seven, you will go to the school and there you will be trained to lead our lives. - They said before dying at the hands of their “governors” of the country.

Narrator: Robert entered school and became a slave. The years passed and he still under their control. Clearly, he knew that he couldn’t do anything and kept a low profile, like everyone else. He doesn’t want to raise suspicions and little by little he dissipated until become a part of all of us (the slave) who live in this land. A few months passed and any slave or governors saw him again.

Robert: I’ve dug my grave to do this and I ready to get in it. No without first going for the head of those who have assaulted my homeland and my life since I was a kid. My parents dyed because of them, I don’t mind dying if it’s to save my town from the injustices of those wretches. The hand of mercy falls on that entire lunatic who dared to profane the foundations of my beloved sacred ground.

Government: The social slave 1 394 141 722 is back. We believed that he was dead. Have you forgotten that are nobody? Or what, do you think that because the slaves 9 843 567 841 and 1 568 498 021 avoid our rule of not naming those who had to take care of and then force them to lose their will, you have the right to face us? You can not against us.

Robert: Shut up! You will pay with blood everything you have done. I’m not a hero, I’m just another slave. A soulless one who has nothing to lose. I won’t die without you coming with me to the beyond. With my hands I will destroy all you have done for so long. You will be surprised to know that I am now a part of you and have the right to everything, yes, to everything you call “divine treasures.”

Goverment: That’s impossible, we govern the system and nobody can be amoung us. We are the masters and owners of this malnourished bitch you call the Holy Land. Nobody can oppose us. Even the death of your parents was a lesson to all those who tried to get up against our will. How did you get it?

Robert: I’m a slave Right? I learnt everything from everyone. I left home to return as someone completely unrecognizable, I enlisted to get this position and since everybody are a puppets, they fell quickly and let me access. I admit it, it was easy to do it. Maybe no one has opposed you after the death of my parents, but nobody has any common sense to stop me either. Now that I also control everything that you control, I can freely decide what will be done and you can’t stop me.

Government: Jajaja Do you expect us not to stop you? Maybe you are among us and our height, but nobody can contradict us, not even we can… No! How is this possible? You can’t destroy our utopia!

Robert: You are wrong. In this town everyone have the right to do whatever we want, except kill other member of the “team.” Now, I’ll start to tearing down your empire of the fake sky and return the glory to my holy land. Let’s start the revolution! That the trees take the children and the teachers so that they can live freely again. That money is worth nothing, and the souls of my friends are clarified. And let this system succumb to its own terror and take them all to where they belong.

Government: Jajaja We can’t kill you, but we also do what we want. That none of this is fulfilled and that all return to their wor… Why nothing happens? What did you do to us Robert? Why can’t we do what we want?

Robert: Because we were all slaves, including you. The time has come and everyone, except me, will return to where they belong. I told you that you would pay with your own blood. Just realize, you’re in a sea of blood, the same blood that you robbed the other slaves and that now they claim as theirs, because it always was.

Government: However, you will also pay with your life. By changing this system, you won’t exist jajaja You have lost! We can back here again, but you no longer jajaja

Robert: In that you are wrong, I will come back as someone else. This system has gone down and the history will speak about how I changed the system to face it up and not just criticize it.

Happy Children's Day?

While everyone was celebrating, he just closed his eyes and holding on the tears, he continued working as seller.

He just heard: “Happy Children’s Day, I love you, my son.”

Everyone walked happily with their children and he tried to dream that they also celebrate it.

He wished sincerely that someone were close to him and even if gave him a hug.

Nobody remembered him.

At dusk, he had to come back to the room where he lived: Completely alone

Old stubborn tree

Say “I love you” was more difficult than pretend to hate you.
I don’t know why you insist on looking for love in an unknown species
Instead of letting you love/ want for your fruits
Oh beautiful tree!
With what injustice you ask others what you have always had.

Why should the fruit be interested in this?
Simple.
Because, in the depth, it keeps loving the old stubborn tree that gave it the life.
Between glories and sorrows
Why insist to keep the tantrums of a kid?
Neither the tree will have what it wants (because it already has)
Neither the fruit will be able to change the posture of the tree.
They are being that comes from other.
So equal, so different.
Why lie and hate?
If today, they can love.

The fruit will grow up and will forget about that tree.
The tree will die and won’t be able to enjoy after the fruit.
Stop hating is the ideal.
Finding love is the challenge.
Live quiet is the dream.

Say “I love you mom” is the truth.
You are the stubborn and old tree.
I am the stubborn and “angry” fruit
Why can’t we be quiet?
Maybe not as before,
But, al least.
to stop hating you

Couplets and poems

SOCIAL NETWORKS

To enjoy the life
You have to live it now
Leave the social networks
To reach the hour.

I’m leaving this false world
To obtain the biggest wish:
To be with my loved ones.
And learn that the beauty of life
Is out there, in the reality.

FOREIGN HEART
I don’t know you, but I know what you think.
You tell me who you are, and what you want.
Light is what you give.
Kimono most beautiful is what you wear.
Jarden of dreams, that’s you.
You idealize things that others just dream.
You baste emotions so easily.
You scream “love” to the four winds.
Forges will in your loved ones.
You emanate joy to my cold body.
You detonate the best of me.
Foreign heart, here I am.

Captura

Pleoxi

My mind is scattered. I try not to sound corny and avoid so many explanations. Silence scares me; the noise bothers me. Nothing satisfies me and my caprice is: have everything; share nothing. I am a person who expresses with his letters what I feel, and with my voice what I want.

Who would be able to play with oxymoron and pleonasms using simple words full of life. I would go up to hell and go down to heaven with the aim of seeing you smile strangely, but proud of me.

I remember I used to say that the only person more beautiful than you was me, now it’s the other way around. You went down to the white, cotton-colored clouds, and climbed to the top in order to know what the outside of my interior doesn’t allow to see. Did you come from within me or did I enter from outside your life?

Writing is fascinating, having fame is my bad habit, earning money will be an insignificant desire for my capricious heart. None of that matters, just write about: all of nothing; nothing of all, because it’s an ironic redundant paradox, right? Jajaja I lost the thread of inspiration and I found it where your long red dress begins.

You are me, and I am you. It is not a contradiction, it is perception. The inconsistencies continue, but my sanity keeps me firm in them. It is not irony or sarcasm, it is the fleeting memory that each one brings me closer to the coherent reality of fantasy. Between doubts I say goodbye, so I can write you again about them and have something to say and nothing to keep quiet.

Read me always and you will notice that there is a new message every time. Take care of yourself lonely and don’t worry about love, that freedom chained will be executed by the chains of freedom.

Horizons
The importance of reading

Finally, I graduated and after many months without working, I finally have a job, well… almost. I just need to go to an interview and the will give me the place I want -as long as I answer everything correctly- with a salary of Q2.500 biweekly. I’m a bachelor, so I don’t need to know to add, subtract, multiply and divide or find the value of a silly X or a Y; much less put accents to all those ridiculous words. Also, what does it matter if they carry an accent or not, if you understand what is said / reads for what to label it?

As the secretary told me, the test is just reading aloud a half-page story and answering a question (and she told me in passing what it is: Why is reading important?) The test can’t be easier. I am the third of five applicants to pass, so I have time to listen to others and be calmer. Finally it is my turn to pass, the truth, the first read very badly. It’s time to show them how to read well jaja. Good morning, my name is René and I will read the next history called “Phobias.” Phobias are a inrational fear that affect other. Among them are: hipopo… hipo-po mounstruo… Wait a moment! That word doesn’t exist!! Where is the boss? I want to talk with him immediately.

Look, young -His personal secretary told me as she grabbed the sheet. I’m sorry that you puts yourself in such a childish attitude, but my boss informed me that he can’t be hired you because he needs a person who is able to read “strange” words and knows how to recognize its mistakes. This test is designed with several long and difficult words to pronounce if the applicant does not read them before. In this case, the word hipopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia is read by part -she advised me as she reads it by parts- hi-po-po-to-mons-tro-ses-qui-pe-da-lio-pho-bia. I was so angry that I didn’t want to know anything else. I was leaving when other secretary told me that I should ask the question. From anger I forgot to do it, so with a blue pencil I answered: “I’m frustrated and I can’t think of a clear answer now.” I gave it to the secretary and went home crying in frustration.

A couple of days later they called me: it was the boss. He told me about the mistakes of pronunciation I had (irrational instead of inrational, phobias are irrational fears instead of phobias are a fear) and he asked me the same question: Why is reading important? I could only answer that if one read beforehand for oneself and then for the others one would manage to avoid passing the problems that I had. He told me that it was a very common answer and that he expected more from me

Narpoe

Every time that I think about our future,
She appears again, and my present changes,
making me come back to the past
and retake a path
that will bring me beyond
I imagine.

Now, I must choose between you and her,
who dominates and directs my works.
Maybe is she whom I must continue,
but that doesn’t mean
that you are not important for me,
you are and for that reason,
I will be with you.

Destiny?

And she smiled at me… her eyes were saying “everything end here, and no one will help you…” I don’t have another option; I have to hug her before she left me in this place, alone without food and clothes…

Then, we realized that everyone had to keep their own path, hoping that someday the destiny gather us again. Since tomorrow I have to choose between stay in the past with the fake illusion that she come back someday or assume that I have the enough power to keep with my life as I knew it before she came at me with her personality.

Sometimes she just doesn’t understand me because her mind is no here, often I think that the only real thing here is my body… Don’t try to understand my mind because if I can’t understand myself you’d not do too, sometimes what I say don’t have sense and is a waste of time looking for its sense.

Sometimes is better just listening to that find the emptiness in yourself…

Remember just heard, don’t try to understand everything or looking for sense…

Time: I just say

Year after year I want to write something sensible.
Day to day I want to express the glories of the life.
Month to month I think that I’m not a fish.
Hour to hour my words drown.
Minute to minute I look for another path.
Second to second I discover myself.
Five years to five years I illustrate everything.
Decade to decade this doesn’t stay.
Century to century I contradict it.
Written to written: I just say.

Sleep Monologue

It uses to be like that, usually is.
I have your attention and I know what to say, but…
The same thing always happens…
Why do I dream you?
Why do you confuse with my reality?
I see you in my most lucid dreams
and I know that you aren’t real.
Maybe it’s because a dream like me,
can’t be real, and, for me, you are my dream.

Heart of peace

Maybe I can’t see you,
and my hands no longer touch you,
and my screams only you hear them.
And… Even if I suffer in silence,
I know that I can have what I’m looking for:
Peace.

I already don’t have words for you,
I don’t anything. And my soul,
together with my heart, they calm down.

The happiness of leaving you behind
after 8 years is what
form my new life
and a heart of peace

The love

Captura1

She

She has an indescribable figure
and every time I see her,
increase my desire
to spend an incredible afternoon.

She is the guilty of that in my mind
and in my heart reason no longer exists,
nor space for something else equally,
She is my motive for a poem or a song.

Since I met her, she always caught my attention
and although several knew her,
she was always my motivation
and for which some wrote:
“Thief of feelings and creator of life.”

Tree

Again, I’m here, watching a part of a tree stained with colorful water. I await that flows the lines that give shape to the amorphous. The others are waiting for their moment to be used. Poor of them. They think they are worth it - sadly, it isn’t so- and the other will never be used… or that’s what the colorful liquid makes them believe. They will, but in time. Just as all will know your virtues when the clock stops flowing and the cuckoo bird no longer breathes… Even if it’s late, we’ll all value what you were in life.

Bad Words

-Bitch!
-You shouldn’t say bad words
-Why?
-Because that’s from adults
-Just for that?!
What an injustice that!
-Let me end first!
It’s from fucked adults
You can do something yet.
We no longer.

Mysteries

And if the happiness we want, we already have it? What would happen if all the mysteries had already been discovered? If all doubt finally was dissipate and there is nothing left to invent or dream. With nothing to know, we’d destroy everything pretending that we don’t know anything: Just like now. We already have all the answers and more than we really need. However, we pretend to ignore it to keep living and thinking that there is something left to do. We know the true, but don’t want to accept it, because of our salvation.

Innocence

Human being complex, beautiful and simple.
For our eyes,
you are the reincarnation of good
and goodness itself.

Your jumpy look express cuteness and curiosity;
your short stature
and the way of see the life,
as well as solve the problems,
makes you the envy of us,
and, at the same time, our greatest joy and treasure.

Do you learn from us? Maybe yes, maybe not
Do we learn from you? Always!
You remind us ourselves to your tender age
and how we saw everything.

When you grow up, don’t stop being who you are,
don’t lose your innocence, be a child forever.

If you dedicate it

If you dedicate it, remember that you can fail
if you say, do it with the heart.
No for illusion or because they answer you something similar,
but because it’s what you feel.

If you sing it, let the passion flows.
That the “cocks” and the detune are the song.
The reason is not in others: no today.

If you declare it, prepare the heart for a "no"
Sometimes is better keep low expectative
and be surprised to don’t fall down dejected
for an impulsive feeling.

If you dedicate it, let every word you say have life.
If you dedicate it, let each thing you do have life.

Andersson

He thought and thought. He wrote and wrote. He stopped and read. He thought and thought. He read and wrote. He stopped and thought. He wrote and wrote. It doesn’t matter what way he takes, all the ideas brings him to the same. He thought and thought. He read and wrote. He thought and stopped.

The name of that one stop him in each word that he says. His name distracted him. He thought and wrote. He read and fell silent. He wrote and stopped. That innocent being harmed his mind. He started to hate himself and hate it until he found it (the thought, no the being). He wrote and followed. He wrote and didn’t stop. He thought and followed. He stopped and read.

His name took him to the same. Finally he could do. He thought and thought. He stopped and read. He applauded and cried: “The work is done” -He thought and presented it. - There was peace and silence. There was a gray day and a kid. There was a bad thought and a desire. There was one opportunity after another and he missed them. There was a friend and he saved him. There was a pending and the time was careless. There was a moment. He thought and didn’t clarify it.

He followed and forgiveness he asked: “Andersson…” -He put his knee on the ground. - “Maybe for you this doesn’t matter, but for me it is.” -He hugged him and said- “I’m sorry for whatever I must ask forgiveness.” -He left him and fell silent.

The answer remained in him, in the expectative, in the time, in this sheet. There was nothing to say. He reasoned and so he left.

Freedom?

The sound of a siren came at me
and I thought that you were dead,
I would’ve prefer that,
to be you who died
in that tragic accident
called freedom.

You believed that to be there
it’d be enough
to be it,
but you just dug your condemnation.


#462
From the other side
Anecdote

It was night. It was cold at the entrance of that house. It was a pigsty, but it seemed a palace in comparison to the others. There lived a very peculiar couple, as some would say, they are like “water and oil.”

That people cannot be more wrong. They were more like the earthly hell and hell itself. In this city everything was normal until they came. The murders and rapes had a big change.

All of us ran away from them. They were psychopaths, bloodthirsty hunters… police, they arrested and killed most of us.

Sustitution

“Just as you had the courage to change me for good since I was young, I also changed you when you were an adult.” It was curious the day I met my killer. I was not afraid, because I knew what he was like. When he confessed that he wanted to kill me, that day I died.

His memories imprison him in life and that’s why he lives in distress; my memories seal this grave. We were both monsters. He lives and pays for me, while I am dead.

Yes, I forced him to change “sugar for salt” when we were children, but he forced me to grow up feeling guilty. That’s why I killed him, and, now, that I am alone: I supplant his identity

Who?

I couldn’t do anything to save him. He was too young when he died. He said that it an accident, somebody treated him and force him. This matter doesn’t upset me, but what he did after: He commented suicide. I had to clean their remains.

I passed with the dozes of hallucinogens and depressives. Anybody never suspected of me and, even if, I ended in this asylum. I feel a little shame for have killed him. My son was a killer and his wife too, but I was angry that they were annoying in my territory.

Judgement

So much I suffered as a child and now as an adult I think I shouldn’t have sold my parents to keep the fortune. How no to miss them! -And I mean the tickets and the things of value.-

Don’t judge me without even knowing the reason of my desire. They were vile and despotic tyrants. They stole everything from everyone. How not to sold them to the justice and earn the reward. They were bad persons, and I was their accomplice. With the money, I paid the bail.

Monologue of the... Rabious?

My life is the same, or worst, as yours. I don’t sleep, I take care of others that being healthy do dumb things, I fight against with brutal beasts and I even have free time, or that’s how they paint at me.

They have never seen me, so who says that this is what I do. I could do the opposite or just do anything and share a day with them. I am just an angel and that’s all what I will say. It’s not a lie nor true. The paradise, for me, is down there: On the Earth.

Stop fighting for arrive here. It’s the same after all these years.

From the other side

From the other side there is nothing. Only the other side.
From the other side is the other side.
From the other side is God, He is, but, he’s not live there, but the other side.
From this side it’s the unknowing.
From the other side there is nothing, but…
Who can show that we are not from the other side?
If it is so… This side is the other side!
From the other side I am: The author.
From the other side of the other side is: the reader decrypting my messages.

Directions

I toured the city a thousand times; I walked how many sidewalk I found.

I was looking for the human being that took away my smile.

At the end I found him. He was in my house: In front of the mirror.

Real freindship

Esteban laughed and then wept. Peter, his best friend, fell down and survived.
He hated him and that’s why he became his best friend: To kill him.

Esteban poisoned the food, Peter held on until he arrived the hospital.
Esteban pushed him against a car but it stopped.
Esteban burned down the house, Peter managed to escape from the flames.

He couldn’t kill him physically, so he pulled out his final ace: Tell him.
He called him and shouted at him: I hate you! You are not real, disappear from my sight, and he disappeared. No Peter, but Esteban. Peter was the real one and Esteban the imaginary one. The therapy killed him and Peter stopped crying. Peter is alone and he doesn’t mind.

Warmth

I was never popular and the day that everyone met I knew I was going to die. why do I say it? Because it’s well know that those who “love you” just gather as crows around the body to distribute the remains and then kill each other.

That day, they put me in the center. Everyone was eating, laughing, yelling, crying, annoying. It had passed 30 minutes when I died. The price to be a flame is highest.

Prisoner

How not to be it if we learned from them. They taught us to wander all the day, to sleep and just when it was necessary, look for something to eat.

We learnt from the young people to walk from house to house at all time and all moment. Yes, the cats taught us to be more humans and now we live as their slaves. This is the price to be a young human with no direction or “social life.”

Sensations

Whoever says that the pain is not beautiful, hasn’t felt the burning stitches of that long thing. There are those who do it fast and doesn’t feel almost anything; others chance the style and do it in one. It doesn’t feel so good, but it’s better than being punched by the pen.

It wasn’t enough for men became us sheets, but even in their unjustified wish to kill the time they nailed us all for fun. If I were a human, I’d be a masochistic, because I like that feeling.

Goal

At the end, I learnt to live with the fear and the nightmares that controlled my childhood stage. The crows were my most beautiful creations, and the darkness with which I dyed black cats allowed me to be anywhere. I can be it their hearts and minds; in the men and women, in front of them or anywhere. I am so strong that they can’t eradicate me.

Declarations

What was I supposed to do? I loved her, and a lot. Not to be reciprocated I would kill her like that. I don’t know why you think I had something to do with it. She only told me that she was happy and, then, I found her dead, next to a picture of her mother. I called you for help and you treated me like a cowardly and hurt

I talked to her tonight, just 2 hours ago. The anger died without I touched her. I am Happiness, and sometimes I depended on her, that’s why I loved her. I knew that if she did not act first, I couldn’t take action to try to fix her disaster.

It’s not fair that you treat me like that, like a poor excuse. You two must know how to live without us; We can help you in your marriage, but not do everything for you.

Today will be the last time

Today will be the last time that I write about you. You have the will I lost and then I gained. I won’t survive for long. However, everything is here.

You are as free as a fart and more serious that this dumb story that you are reading, but, seriously, you are the reason why I run out of ideas. You are who make me write cool things and today you want to do nonsense things.

Today will be the last time this happens; from now on, I will take the control and guide our path together.

In the luch

Many times I’ve eaten alone, and yesterday was no exception. I ate accompanied by several people. I thought I was going to feel good… and that’s how it was: I felt happy… once I finished my food and that people disappeared on their cellphones.

I had never been as alone as yesterday, in my ownhouse, with my family. We seemed everything, except a family. That’s why I ate thinking I was alone and not badly accompanied, although in the end it was the same… people around me eating, and I: alone.

Remembering
The science of the love

I am a subject taking the place of someone else at a different time, tomorrow they will have it, today I have it, yesterday someone else had it Oh! It always changes its user and time, but never its being. I am of a hard character to handle, everyone knows it. When they are with me, I am the most resistant. Even though they see me, they don’t recognize me. Despite my great usefulness and consecutive use.

Now you. You are kind, your customs and kindness allows you to adapt to any environment regardless of the time of year, although I try, I can’t live without you, because you are life.

Oh, if you saw! I remember that party where we met. We were both at the special guest table. While you smoked, I hurried to inflate balloons to decorate the place. I saw how all the smoke ran through your fine body.

I also remember the rich dessert of strawberries with cream and jelly that they gave us. The rest of the evening, our qualities were mixed in a single dance until midnight, where we became one.

Land without kids

I had a nightmare: A future without children. It was not because of a war, but because everyone grew up and forgot everything. I could do nothing to avoid it, my son was the last one.

I wished he would never grow up and he would be 13 years old. I was screaming for him not to lose his childhood, however: I failed. He turned 13 and forgot everything. Now we are condemned to the eradication of innocence and happiness.

Emotions

They say that every emotion and feeling is unique and can’t be changed or confused with another. How wrong they are!

“On Friday 11/27/15 a fatal catastrophe will happen inside each human.”

Logic: Ahg! Those “apocalyptic” ads are as true as that Anger is happy being who he is.
Anger: I am. But nobody should know it.
Logic: It doesn’t make sense what you say, you know. According to me, you must always be angry. You, being happy? Jajaja how funny.
Anger: What a logic yours, Logic. You’re very smart. -Said sarcastically.
Logic: Do you see? That’s how you are and that’s how you’ll always be. You can’t change who you are. Goodbye.
Anger: Shut up! Today I’ll be someone else… Today I’ll be… Mmm… I’ll think about it later.

That’s how Anger forgot what he said and came back the same as always.

Perfection

Esteban is a 12-year-old boy, says he is in love with Esther. They both study at José Valdez III, outside the capital, to the north. Every day he gave her different gifts. A special gift caught Esther’s attention: “Who I dream.” It was very corny, but the message was sincere and beautiful.

“All this time I’ve been thinking about you. Every time I see you, I only see the beauty of a tree that is strong and capable of everything, but at the same time, a delicate flower that knows who to ask for help. Others will have better attributes than you, and that, to me, doesn’t matter. You are who I want. With all and imperfections. Your eyes reach my heart and my soul shudders. Your hair is curly and soft like clouds: spongy and cushioned. You are so thin that your smile would cut my sorrows and sadness. I sincerely love your personality. Those perfect imperfections are the ones I love.”

It’s a very rare letter to come from him. There is no doubt that the most beautiful thing is that someone falls in love with your imperfections. That’s why Esther is with Esteban. My daughter is growing as well as her friend, and possible boyfriend.

Remembering

OXYMORON
The complexity of the simplicity is the simplicity of the complexity.
Like the bird jumps, the pigeon flies. Like the cat meow, the dog barks…

SILENCE
I love the sound of the silence, it reminds me to your look.
While my memory lies in the space and the nights where I loved just disappear.

OTHER LIFE
I passed to the other life for a tomb. There is so much light here, that I stay in the dark, now I live in the death.

DANGER
I found something more dangerous and fatal that the drugs and the tobacco together: His memory. Before it was a synonymous of happiness; today, of sin and torment. His name just kill who knows it.

FLEETING MEMORY
There is no special reason or just the time that slips from your hands is what left from those memories.

DISTANCE
’Cause your kisses and hugs were everything. The distance killed everything that united us: The pain, the sadness and all the bad things. All of them died in the last second that we saw each other. Thanks for coming to the funeral and be here.

FATE
The boy saw her. She rejected him.
He grew up alone; her too.
He died, and she cried.
She saw his pale body and kissed it.
He woke up from her look and came back
At home knowing that fate.

Gentleman
The thought of the gentleman
Is threatened by the desires
Of those ugly thoughts
And whose desires
Are exposed from the inside
Of oneself with the simple fact
Of not wanting to see them.
False illusions we make,
Unknowingly,
In the trap of them fall.
All that we are,
We will give
And we will be happy.

Rosterg

As a sorcerer, I had the opportunity to go to hell and return … I would say safe and secure, but it’s impossible. Nobody can go there and come back as if nothing. The army of Satan trained hard and went out to attack daily.

There were three particular demons, I called them: Alarick (weak physically, but the best torturer) Dest (Deformed and grotesque, cunning, clever and cynical, although his appearance overshadowed all his attributes) and Rosterg (Different in every way, he looked like a human.) Satan was afraid of him and wanted to destroy him.

Somehow, they saw me and before I could react, Satan was already very close to me. I thought I was going to die in that instant, but Rosterg saved me by opening a hole and throwing me into it. In the distance, I saw how the others took advantage and they killed him.

That’s how the demon who did badly his work was eliminated. Not always the bad is bad; and the good is good. That depends on what and how you want to see the matter. In the sad case of Rosterg -Yes, his death hurt me in the soul- his punishment was to disappear for doing wrong the bad.


#463
Connected
One more light

I knew you were in poor health
I’ve seen you fall and get up many times
I thought that this time you would do too.
I didn’t ignore the signs, I just trusted more than I should.

The pain that the illness caused I couldn’t stop
I tried to make us forget it though the laughter
It did help you?
I want to believe that it was.

The brilliance of the things
we lived together
the world never saw them
because the darkness doesn’t cover me
when we all were together.

How many life’s didn’t you hit
with your personality!
There were moments we had all,
but we couldn’t hold on.

We still smiled in the middle of
the weeping and the desolation.
"There were just thing we couldn’t have, material things."
You used to say:

“The panorama painted a birth with a million stars.”
It was the type of landscapes you liked.
The fireflies turned on their heart’s lights.
Everything was so beautiful… Just lacked one thing: One More Light.

We didn’t know how to carry it,
We’re quicker when we were little;
now we want to go faster
because we can’t live without you.
We don’t want to comprehend
we are just a moment;
another star in the infinite firmament.

Everybody around me pretended to be strong the day of your departure.
Some -with fake smiles- said
Who cares when someone’s time runs out?
Let it rest!
They did for their sake.
Their pain was too great to endure it.

Everyone have their ideas,
I wasn’t the exception,
but I cared your departure.
It hurt me.
It doesn’t matter how much I screamed,
You wouldn’t come back,
But I do.

The remainder are the way where you are
They pull the floor from your feet;
I asked them to did it.
I need to see you again for don’t feel me lonely.

In the kitchen, there was a place,
one more chair that you needed.
I didn’t understand why you were so angry
until I put myself on your shoes.

Then I thought "you should be."
It’s not fair we treat you like a dying man
when you were always full of life.

“Just you can’t see it, it doesn’t means,
it isn’t there.” Said your look,
Even if your smile tried to hide it.
Now that this light isn’t in the firmament anymore,
I just can cry and scream
while I get the answer…
Do I care be just one more light?
Well, I do.

The tide

As the crustaceans that adhere to the deck.
As the light that keeps shining in the most intense night.
My desire for taste your energy extends on the Cristal surface.
Your presence explodes my wild, passionate and sentimental side.
I feel guilty for not telling you before…
But the tide covers the evidence of my being.

You appeared being “another one.” I was a “stain on the sheet.”
I fought against my essence until I broke this barrier.
I smiled and recognized your existence. I went crazy and lost my logic.
I believed blindly that my perversion would fade away, but it wasn’t like that.
Whispering and yelling we met under the light of the moon
On the tide where the dead men sing their regrets and sorrows.

The game started before we knew it,
You were there, being an innocence, but depraved being;
I was still in my shell scared and of everything and everyone.
I took the reins of the game as I could and I left everything to the fate.
The tide called him, nothing he left, nor his spirit remained.
He’s gone Oh! He’s gone.
The words couldn’t save him… Maybe they even killed him.

I couldn’t rescue him, that’s why I came back to be a crustacean…
The light keep shining where he used to be
The darkness covered my life. I see you and I can’t talk to you.
That’s my curse, the wish of my heart.
Walking aimlessly I find you everywhere, majestic being…
I can’t touch your being, nor they mine.
In the end the tide took him.
No he, but me.

The firts mistake Ft. Honey8

I come to you to break our chains, tearing down our barrier and finally forget our regrets. I am not the one to guide you about wrong and right, I’m just one of those people who don’t know themselves, but I know what was their first mistake.

Our instincts tell us blindly follow what others do, disregarding what we believe. We comfortably talk about food, clothes and other common topics, but not about suicide and depression as they are catchy and steal our attention, something that we consider an imagination or a taboo.

The first mistake was to bear the pain and remain silent, the first mistake was to overthink, the first mistake was our denial for rebel or protest, the first mistake was believing in something without fundamentals or any reason, the first mistake was to live the life without be alive.

It’s hard to live with this pain, that inevitable pain which is always there as a heavy hand to bring us down. But I can help you.

Help and praise, work and build
take out your regrets and your sins.
Shout out to those, who object your will
Leave them behind and climb hour hill
Respect all opinions along with yours
Follow the humanity and learn from those cures
Give time to yourself and learn how to roar
And now that’s first mistake doesn’t exist anymore…

One more tear

"In each lived experience there is a memory that remains dormant in the mind, until one awakens it, thus producing one more tear. Whether it’s joy or sadness, it’s there, waiting… "

Raul had waited a long time to tell Raquel how he felt about her: disgust, repudiation and hatred. The day he did it, Raquel didn’t feel anything, not a single sign of importance, she simply watched how Raúl said everything, or rather, shout at her. When he finished, Rachel let out one tear after another.

Raúl cared little and left. Out of nowhere, he heard a scream and then a loud laugh. It was Rachel crying with laughter. It turns out that Raúl had a bean peel on his teeth, and because of that, Raquel didn’t pay attention to the things that Raúl said.

Accostumed future

I was returning from college when a guy approached me and with a gun in hand told me to give him the most important thing that I had with me. I only had one book so I gave it to him. He ran away from the place and I went back to my house scared.

One week after the incident, I took another route and that guy found me again. It was 8:00 pm and he told me the same thing. I was just carrying another book by the same author, so I gave it to him hoping he would leave. But with the gun pointed at my head he forced me to stay with him while he read it.

Scared and with no other option, I listened to him and at midnight he let me go. I don’t know what the eagerness he had with me because every week he found me. I admit that the first 3 months were difficult because I couldn’t do anything to get away. He knew very well how to disguise.

After the year since the first time, he assaulted me, more than 50 books read, and he disappeared. A mixture of feelings came over me. I came to consider my friend after the fourth month (when he stopped pointing me with the gun and asked for a different book every week) and when he told me he was going to leave that life of theft, I was happy. I have a feeling that he died trying to escape from that hell.

I didn’t believe that he wanted to be the president, and even more, that he won the elections. The day of the inauguration, he said he was going to raise all the taxes. He fulfilled it. I suppose that people can succeed but never change their bad habits. Today he gave me an envelope with Q.25 000 and said: “Don’t forget the other book.”

Woman, simply woman

Feel the warmth of her words,
the warm of her hugs,
Taste the sweet sound of her advising voice,
The softness of her hands on my shoulders pushing me forward,
This is the woman who loves,
and take care of you,
that woman is simply
a woman
whose wisdom is misunderstood by many
and appreciated by few.

Woman!
Natural beauty
And of abysmal talent.
Throw me away from the problems
And keep teaching my heart
to understand how your incredible world works,
that, with delusions and greatness,
for you, everything is possible,
and more when your wise side appears.

Woman, simply woman.
Love of heart
And forgive my mistake
makes you the best.
Woman!

G.M.

The closeness of time
desolated the loneliness of
our beings.

Different bodies, same blood.
Different characters, same life.

I can’t comprenher her understanding.
But I want o please her last steps.

Should this be like this?
No! It’s my life.
Yes! It’s her life.

Similar desires, equal intentions
Empty the instinct, fill the spirit.

A sigh and a silence
leave this in the rest…

Respect and love is what is left.

Empty

I resorted to my lines
to hide my heart,
and with him,
My sins, sadness, sorrows,
joys, fantasies,
defeats and glories
How many times I didn’t do it!

Today I confess this,
as if it were my biggest secret,
I don’t doubt that more than one
will find what I’m talking about,
nevertheless,
nothing guarantees that
this one, doesn’t be,
other, text:
empty…

Those are just words

A hug with taste of goodbye was the last thing that was known about him. Samuel is his name. He left us many messages and we didn’t read them. We were deluded. He had a “friend”, who kept quiet what she saw.

He spoke to silence, because this one did answer him. Samuel listened to his heart and tried to move on. He fell when he kept quiet. He was just another who thought that being someone in life was a goal, but it wasn’t like that. Samuel wasn’t his real name, he called A… His friend knew it…

Now to you!.. If you never cared his presence, don’t pay attention to his states, they have nothing to do with you… It can’t understand. Both knew his fate. How forget the slow walk of a dead man who blinded his life in an instant! She managed to overcome the fear by saying it, but failed in the time of fulfill it.

Somehow, she talked to us. He has not yet heard the voices inside his head, but he was already determined to lose his life… Who cared? Nobody. It’s another suicide more… “With time the loved ones will forget you” for better or worse… you’re just one more dead person.

Why did he do it? She knew it, if she could speak, she would have avoided it, but preferred to see him kill himself than talk… His final words were: “I am not a man anymore, just a memory in the broken hopes of someone… Yours.” She said anything in that moment. She was a building. Little did it matter, he died being what he was: A rapist.

Yeah! In the end and after many years we still don’t know each other. We have been lied too… Here there is no “we”, but “I” and that “I” is really “him.” My name is V… And: Today I breathe again. It was worth leaving. I feel alive. I had to make them believe I was dead to run away from there.

I found something more harmful and fatal than drugs and tobacco: His memory. Before it was synonymous of joy, today of sin and sorrows… His name just kills those who know him, and although the years have passed and of all the words, I can’t say your name is the first, today, the history is other. I can say it, but nobody can hear it… Suicide in the hell is salvation in heaven.

Connected

This is a strange event. Since I was a kid the lake always called me my attention. I believed in some iridescent beings, at least that’s what I called them. The years passed and I stopped seeing them. Today, a crime brought me here again, and that feeling is back. They think I know what I feel No! Despair is bigger than the fear, and hope is a sweeter made of innocent blood.

Exactly, here is the mystery that I must solve. Since when? Why the hope is made of blood? No one can save what doesn’t belong to them. It is well known, but little -by some- that we can help each other with any problem, but when it is about ourselves, we are empty souls, hollow souls who wander in search of a genuine love. However, the matter is other.

i feel that those beings have something to do. The silence is a sign of their presence and gray nights are their favorites. I am a detective, but not of those of TV, but a real one. My mind brought me here.

I moved towards a barrier corral connected with a stream. Do you see it? Do you know what I’m talking about? You should pay more attention to the landscape and not just to a small part. You lose the sky by searching stars. Do you hear the sound of the silence? Curious. isn’t it? You see the answer, but you ignore the reality of the fact -Who knows why-. Today we will rest in the water. In the morning, I will look at where the riddle’s answer is published…

Wait, that one is already discovered! Did you see it? If not, check your dream world well… There it is. Buy yes, beware of those iridescent beings, it does not know what are they looking for and what they want to do once they have it.

So be careful because you will never come back… Therefore, if you are connected with me, you’ll have seen the loopholes; If not, you must learn to difference between the fantasy from the true, and the oneiric from the fictitious.

Colors

Green as the Quetzal,
Light blue as the sky,
Blue as their eyes,
Red as the heart.

Black as my thoughts
White as my reaction.
Purple as the blows
Gray as your absence.

Without you, colors are left over,
Words adorn the silence.
A final brown line
drawing a sign:
Encouraging.

Let me, let you

Let me smile, let me lie,
Let me cry, let me scream.
Let you love, let you sorrow.
Let you comprenher, let you express.

Let me be, let me go,
Let you feel, let you say,
Let me know, let me meet,
Let you leave, let you live.

Let us be humans,
let us be kids, and have fun:
Dad.

Let us be persons,
Let us dream, and fly:
Mom.

Lightnington

Over the darkness world where all the hope is lost and there is nothing else to see, but a weak light on the horizon shine saying: “remember all the sadness and frustration and let it go…”

A voice from that light tell us a history, its history, pay attention:

Where the stars sing, your light shines by itself over that dark world covering in white rays yours.

Some soldiers appear running to reach your fire. In a park, they look around it searching through the shadows and that mist. What are they looking for? You!

Their friends need your lights. Where are the angels singing? Those soldiers won’t give up in their fight against the dark, even if your light goes out. Our will will be the path.

Keep showing us your energy and together we will protect each other and our world from that black presence. This light is their leader, and those warriors are ourselves!

Without anyone realized it, the history that the voice told them became into the reality. Now with all the problems we have in our own lives, we always take care of the others, because we are not friends, we are family, and together we scream:

#FuckDepression!
#MakingChesterProud!

There is no need to say be strong, we are strong! So I just say:
Don’t forget that I love you all and love the life!

My son

I dreamed with have a child
To care him, love him,
Want him, protect him,
Teach him to be a human with feeling
Instead an interest crawl tool.
Since I was young, that was my desire.

When that day came,
I realized that,
I didn’t have the necessary to be it,
In case of fulfill my wishes
And cover your needs,
I made you suffer
A lot of things that you didn’t deserve.
I wanted to die
And avoid the pain,
But I couldn’t
Leave you to your luck.

Your heart
Was so strong and noble,
That you know how to conform me
In those moments.
Passed some years
We went ahead.
You’re still being my son
Despite I cease
To be your father…
I became your friend
A moment.
At the end of the street,
You turned into my father
And I, in your son.
You knew forgive my mistakes
And fixed my path
How much I thank you!

“Old age will be hard” I thought,
But you soft human touch
And warrior heart
Made me wish with my soul reach it.
I called you as my best friend
Because I knew that it fitted in you:
Chester
Keep shining!

Sonnets
Of the wrong feelings

“To kiss you slowly I send…”
He awoke from the place that created his soul
He never stayed waiting or calm
and then he dug a grave in the river.

My mistake wasn’t love him since I laugh
but his body touch with my palm.
It’s not him, I’m the one who disallows
He was a very shy and cold underage.

My attempts were in vain, I understand.
However, I’m still love him, and I won’t go
without fight for what he is suffering

I should leave him and go
… To these feelings I can’t understand
I miss him, but I have to continue.

Memories of the ancestral navigator

The gusts of wind took us
where the angels cried
The insipid nights swallowed
our memories that were there

We saw those truths that charged
with those lies that our hearts
desired, for they longed
forget the emptiness they saved

We shared our joys
We tried to think in your kindness
and how you would hug us

“The life that is in your extremities
is not just for dreaming” - You said.
… We liked those skills.

The ocean lies restless now

A light reflected in the tide
is the warmth of his bright being
is a big and flashing start
… In his absence the night surrounds us.

Oh love! With my pain do anything.
Insensitivity is suffocating
Show me your radiant smile!
I’m so unhappy with this life.

Fled from everything and everyone out of fear
I can’t pretend I will be able
to smile and forget the pain

In the seas that foreman traveled…
The last you said was “heat”
I just want you find your peace.

Beats of the defunct heart

My life was empty from before
I was nobody, nor did I want to change it
I wandered to say it and think about it
I was who followed the dominant ones.

I let their honor down to forget it
I went to live in “Hanging Gardens”
There, everyone are my companions
I found how to die without saying

My good image is what was left
Don’t resent me, I’m not worth it
I wasn’t important and I hindered them

His wife and his friends cry his sentence
The foreman left then when he was
looking for a reason to the dinner.

The singing of the nocturnal birds

One day the birds will be silent:
What we see, know and want.
Will this be the last thing we say?
The rain takes away what we have.

Our dream is for those we know
Can we understand what we leave behind?
Since the horizon is another today, do we fly?
Being possible that we reflect.

Whether the cemetery fell
The old bushes adorn
And our hearts hear them.

With our simple singing cry
And with the whistle they fulfilled
Only this way, life, make us happy.


#464
Contador
Jonny, plastic skin

You used to love, even when everyone taught you to hate.
You used to act, instead of thinking things so much.
You used to life, before turning a machine.
You used to enjoy life and time, instead of questioning the future.
Jonny, plastic skin, you used to listen to and advise.
Now everything slips like a raincoat, sheltering you from the rain.

Life has been easy for you, it’s you who complicates it.
Did you erase your past? Then who or what are you?
Is this your happiness? Has being like this given you the joy you wanted?
Is this why you’re plastic?
Oh Jonny!

You realize that you lose youth for a false life,
but… you deny it… you don’t change it…
You walk toward blindly, you don’t see both sides, only backwards
like a crab running away from its fate.
Who is hidden behind you name? Why that fake identify?
It seems I don’t know you, however I feel your thoughts.
Some chains don’t save your life, nor your sorrows: They only suffocate you.
That event… He’s fine, you didn’t hurt him. He is healed and saved.
Why don’t you want to be? Time has passed. Does it make sense to do it now?..
Jonny… Silence is still speaking for you.

The mask that you hide behind that plastic skin
doesn’t let you see what you lose.
There are endless of words that describe
your noblest feast and great deeds.
Hidden from you, but no from all.
Jonny look at you with the eyes that judge us,
those that are severe and reveal the truth.

Your ears lead to the voices you long to find.
Your brain tries, but your skin prevents it.
Jonny, you can’t be alone if I’m locked up with you:
In this skin, in this mind, in your heart of hay, in your life.

Do you understand what we feel when we see you defeated by such stupidity?
I know you’re ashamed, but you must get up off the ground.
Not for him, not for me, not them, but for yourself.
If it’s true that you are condemned, at least die in a dignified manner.

Jonny: My sentence is to live without him… I can’t allow that this consumes me.
: C’mon man! Watch your future with or without him you cannot be like this.
Jonny: I miss him, I want him, and I want to be with him!
: And in that state are you going to look for him? He will flee at the mere sight of you. You are giving pity.
Jonny: What do you care! Leave me alone!
: I don’t care [about] him, but your welfare… I’ll help you to get there.
Jonny: How?! Take me where his memory lies and his spirit lives.
: Just stand and use your senses, is the only you need, he will be waiting for you.
Jonny: I will do anything for him. Even get up from this pigsty I call life…

You are still here, standing and waiting, pretending to be something more than a sentimental plastic.
Your mind never controlled its power. Why not try it now that you want to be free?
You still don’t realize yet, right? You don’t see it, much less you feel it, but you begin to be other. I don’t know if the real one or someone else.
Today you’re living what you want to live,
behind are the days where you used to live their life.
That’s how the freedom feels, right?

Today you are giving me a smile, you’re paying attention to your worlds.
Not to a point, but the landscape.
I feel that you refuse to believe that you emerge from your subconscious.
You begin to raise your gaze, not in sigh of of arrogance, vanity or pride, but of courage and boldness in the face of fear
You no longer depend on time, only on your will.
Change that rigid useless plastic for a determination of iron.
Your barriers, today, you are pulling them. Simply with the fact of being free.

What’s the point now? What is the relationship?
Jonny, you come back to the past, not to live of it, but to learn.
Jonny, today you are another Jonny.
Your look is still hidden, but your character is different.
It’s never too late to live and experience the nature.
Nothing stops you now, however an obstacle is holding you back.

Reality and Fantasy created in your imagination an event that ended up being executed…
The memory of something bad (according your moral code) that happened, didn’t affect the other part.
Everything is fine, and if not, at least that for for which you complain is
Do you understand? Your problem was cured long ago.
Coldly face that fear that makes you uncomfortable;
and with forgiveness to the other part. Just follow that hunch.

I still remember, in the distance, your “transformation”:
You were born like any other: Being a kid who knew nothing about life.
During your growth you were very human.
You distrusted, and still you helped.
After some events you changed your skin for that plastic.
You did it without wanting to, you just pretended to shelter from pain
that the world still manages. You saw the bad and took care of it.
Today you are modifying it. Step by step you are evolving.
This day your time is over, you couldn’t reach your goal.
Your sadness seizes your soul and dulls the faces of your face…
Calm down, Jonny, calm down. There is still a hope:

Go directly and verify that he is there.
After all, your heart demands this step to become your real self.
So Jonny, come back to life, be yourself again.
Leave that plastic, stop being numb.
Jonny, stop being Jonny.

Adrian, the last soldier

The gentle breeze that afternoon caressing the fine face of that beautiful boy sitting in the central square of his hometown was the ideal place to rest after another day surviving the tasks imposed by life and demanded by himself.

Seeing the yellowish orange painted on a pinkish red and accompanied by a warm regular coffee he threw himself to the floor to appreciate the changes of the landscape that went from being alive and happy to dark and empty… The night had returned and he had to advance to a place safer…

Adrian was called, he was 10-11 years old when it all started … It had only been about 2-3 months when his mother had to leave. The feeling of loneliness, abandonment and nostalgia had seized him. His refined and beautiful face hid something more.

In his footsteps walk the souls of his loved ones, while his hands are stained with blood and other unknown liquids, and in his head there is no room for anything other than the return to the world that he himself helped destroy. Not because of his bad actions, but because of his indifference to life.

Yes, Adrian enjoyed his day to day, but he disliked people, that is, crowds. It means, many years ago, so he does not care now. However, he knows that the worst is yet to come…

They thought that Adrian was abandoned by his mother, but it was not like that. He killed her and then escaped from his home to face his fate.

It was a difficult decision to make, the discussion lit the gap of hope and terror. In that exchange of words both (mother and son) said everything and their hearts closed the wounds that had long been open.

Adrian still remembers the last word he said to his mother: “I will return …”

This is how that word became his promise, and until he does not comply he will not be able to die, that’s why he always flees at night and enjoys the morning light. He knows very well that when they reunite everything they lived will not be worth more and it is also another reason for him to appreciate his surroundings.

With the passing of the seconds his name became synonymous with bewilderment. No data that was obtained about him ended up being true, only his name is true. He earned the nickname of last soldier because he was the only survivor of a family massacre and managed to charge them all to the culprits, he did not kill them, because his punishment was worse than death itself.

Accompanied by a splendid ear and a fine vision (almost as fine as the details of his face) Adrian valued every moment wherever he was. A thousandth of a second was enough for everyone to discover the truth about Adrian. He was…

Days

There are days where we live happy,
There are days where we live coping the things.

“Days are made to live them under a feeling”
I like to think that.

Can we choice which feeling we want for each day?
Sometimes yes; other no
We depend on external things

Sometimes you want to be sad.
The day does not allow you
because it can think too,
what happens is that our
understanding is limited.

Sometimes the days don’t allow you to be happy.
They tent to act as persons too.
When they want to throw a tantrum
we have to put up with.

Days!
Made to be lived,
but we waste them…

Life!
segmented in little moments,
awaiting there
to be a part of our past and memories.

Days where you win,
Days where you lose,
Just days.

Good or bad ones
the days are days
Sometimes so imcomprehended
Sometimes so “humans”
But at the end:
Days.

Coffee

With the aroma of coffee, so the morning was painted that everything changed. It was the typical morning with the same routine as the other days. Accidents, deaths, doubtful ethical issues, pending things to do, boring meetings, mechanical classes, family problems, careers at work, personal secrets and private matters.

So what was new or spectacular that morning? What was the change? He was just alive, and for the first time he experienced the life he always pretended to live, that is, he stopped lying to be able to feel.

His spirit now lies in the reality that he abandoned for more than 15 years. His body finally works. His lies can be said are true.

Yes, a coffee, a bread with beans, no memories and a new day are the product of having woken up early from a dream. He can’t ensure that life will smile, but the ephemeral is also used and enjoyed.

He no longer lets things affect him -so much- and he faces properly the consequences.

With aroma of morning coffee says goodbye to his past. With the aroma of Guatemalan coffee, this is how his new journey begins. With the aroma of fresh coffee, he prepares his new work. After concluding with it, his new path continues.


#465

I’ll find time to read most of it :grin:


#466

Take your time. The previous posts are my book separate in Chapters.


#467

Ok sounds exciting


#468

@IronSoldier16 , have you considered a personal website?


#469

To be honest no. Even though I have seen some options like WordPress and similar pages.

Why the question?


#470

Because you hit the character limit in one of your posts. It was the reason I moved to a site for my thread.